My Reasons
by Gambit's Nightmare
Summary: Xavier and Sinister put aside their differences and conspire to crash the wedding between Remy and Essex's daughter! Complete.
1. An Exchange

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

**Chapter 1 – An Exchange**

**Dear Charles Xavier,**

There are few things in this world, or any other, that contend with a man's love for his daughter. Such is true for Lizzie, who, for whatever reason, I bonded with more than any other child I've created during my long tenure as the world's resident mad scientist. Deciding against disposing or otherwise harming her, I kept her by my side and molded her into an apprentice of sorts. Of course, all the planning in the world would not have prevented a certain dislikable Cajun from fucking up my plans for her life, if you will pardon my language. The doctor is out, and the rather infuriated father is in.

Remy is an interesting man. I've always been fascinated by his physiology, powers, and survival instincts; this lead me to extensive scrutiny of him for years, during which I also learned of his guilty pleasure: beautiful women. innumerable women have fallen prey to that boy's charm, and I must acknowledge, it's quite extraordinary. Remy, for all practical purposes, is the antithesis of the gentleman a father wants to see his daughter with. Besides the fact that his blood alcohol content has been astronomically high each time I've brought him in, he's also brash, uneducated, lethargic…the list could continue for the rest of this page, but I shall spare you the nuisance.

Ten years ago, at the 'ripe' old age of only sixteen, Remy was kidnapped and brought to me. As an adolescent, he was expected to be involved in certain acts of debauchery, especially considering his upbringing as an expert thief among the Thieves' Guild (Did I mention that I object strongly to his courting my daughter?) and his naturally relaxed persona. My role as a physician, scientist, and geneticist has trained me to study a person by investigating that person's corporeal self. In this particular case, I managed to learn quite a lot about Remy just by what was _on_ his body.

More specifically:

On his body:

-Tequila (chest)

-Lipstick (4 colors, spread all over Remy's face, neck, chest, and penis)

-Vaginal fluids (2 donors, samples found on Remy's chin)

Current injuries:

-Human fingernail markings (back, shoulders)

-Broken blood vessels on neck, chest, and lower pelvis (hickeys, I kid you not)

-Light facial bruising

-Cuts over knuckles

Now, this paints a very accurate picture of Remy at that age. God knows how many nights ended like this – Remy covered in lipstick and booze. I faintly remember being this age and I do not even think I knew anyone who behaved as such. Regrettably, that was a dissimilar era, and Nathaniel Essex never came home with traces of female on him, as touching was considered to be so indecent back then. A shame really, when my subsequent decisions are analyzed I really can't help but wonder if I would have developed into an executioner if I had a bit more sexual attention in my own day.

I will admit that maybe I was slightly cruel to Remy on more than a few occasions. He repeatedly crossed the line between 'patient' and 'specimen,' something I'm not particularly proud of. As Remy grew into adulthood, I think my actions very negatively affected him in that each time I examined him over the next few years, he was suffering from untreated illness or injury, suggesting a fear of physicians and possibly infirmaries. Consequently, each new experience with Remy left me with more power over him as his fear of both myself and my practices increased exponentially.

On several occasions before his twenty-first birthday, I enlisted his help in a variety of matters. His crippling fear, accompanied by a variety of mind control methods, made him ideal; there was that one matter that you know well about. Yes, the one that lead to Remy's unfortunate abandonment by Rogue – I must say, that was a fine example of teamwork! If I knew what I know now (that he would become so involved with Liz), there is no chance in hell I would save him again. The good Lord knows I would kill him if Liz would not hold it against me. Wishful thinking, at best.

The purpose of this letter, essentially, is to awaken you to the inevitabilities that face us. With Remy estranged from his family, he relies heavily on you for advice; and you know this marriage will only hurt both of them. While I care significantly less about Remy's feelings, you cannot deny the utter stupidity that has overcome Remy and Liz for this entire relationship. Liz is beautiful, brilliant, and, frankly, far superior to Remy in almost every way imaginable. It is not unreasonable to assume that he probably craves her attention primarily because of this fact. Therefore, I think that it might be difficult for you to give your blessing to this debacle.

While I mean no disrespect to Remy's person, I do not foresee Liz being happy with an idiotic thief who cannot speak proper English, much less satisfy her intellectual needs. Please reconsider my suggestion.

Yours truly,

**Nathaniel Essex**

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**Dr. Essex,**

I was surprised to receive correspondence from you, and understand your utterly desperate position, as I find myself in an equally uncomfortable place. Your paternal instincts are right on target, except you forget one very important thing.

Your daughter is a wicked creature.

Elizabeth, while all of the things you described, also possesses something you do not: youth. You speak of being young? She is young and entitled to her own discretions, as long as they remain within reason, which they do not. Due to his rearing, Remy is not like most of my other students in that only slight traces of very basic morality guide him along in life. Suffice to say that I was highly disappointed when Lizzy showed up and brought him several rungs on the ladder of morality, which she apparently cannot appreciate, a trait I'm sure she possesses because of you.

It is my personal belief that the marriage will be a disaster because one-half of it will be composed of the brilliant moral vacuum that is your spawn. The warmth in Remy's heart is not enough for both of them, and he is a good man, deep down inside. The very tenderness that allows him to look past you to love Liz will probably kill him someday. I do, however, agree with your assessment that Remy craves her attention because he suffers from a serious self-esteem issue that I won't go into detail here.

As far as your comments about Antarctica are concerned – you can go fuck yourself, if you'll pardon my language. Being the 'superior' intellect among the two of us, maybe you have learned that his own insecurity probably played heavily in his judgment. Even if it did not, I shall make no apologies for my team. With the types of situations they find themselves in, I expected a grave mistake to be made eventually, although I deeply regret that it involved Remy, whose life really has not been fair at all (which is mostly your fault).

All of that aside, I have tried repeatedly to talk sense into Remy, who I think believes he has no soul left to sell, and has been caught up in the bravado of cheap thrills and wicked women.

Your Truly,

**Charles Xavier**

**Read and review. Or else!**

…

**Pwitty pwease?**


	2. Friction

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

**BlkDiamond** – Thanks! I love Sinister for whatever reason. So many interesting angles.

**BJ** – Isn't it great to watch serious characters act silly? It works, hopefully. Appropriate vengeance for a character like Remy, non?

**Chapter 2 – Friction**

**Dear Charles,**

'…_although I deeply regret that it involved Remy, whose life really has not been fair at all (which is mostly your fault).'_

Is not acceptable cost what I am so often critiqued for?

Assume for a moment that I possessed entirely and utterly pure motives for the Massacre. If I told you that killing them saved the world, you would look less harshly upon my actions and discharge them as a necessary malevolence; if I had a wholly unrighteous or unjustifiable cause (such as that you suppose me to have), would it make a difference?

No, it would not. The Morlocks remain dead and the impact of my measures remain unchanged. The same lives would be ruined, the same guilt would be felt. The one and only difference that having altruistic motives would make is that the judgemental bystanders would sleep a little better and evaluate me a little less harshly. Obviously, I care about neither of these things. However, you fail to appreciate the costs of your own actions, and those of your team.

'_Being the 'superior' intellect among the two of us, maybe you have learned that his own insecurity probably played heavily in his judgment.'_

Preposterous!

How on earth is it possible that Remy lived with the world's so-called greatest telepath for years and his true nature was never exposed? Becoming an X-Man was Remy's way of beginning the long journey to atonement. You would be amazed at how many sins go without expiation when a person is dead; the presumption is an attempt to absolve both yourself and your team for the charade where the beloved X-Men left one of your own (possibly the most useful one, at that) to freeze to death. In addition, the theory is highly improbable, considering the massive damage to his mental shields occurred during the psychological aftermath while he was recovering, meaning he spared your band of murderers from feeling the pain they caused Remy.

Speaking of which, I was somewhat amazed initially that anything was capable of breaking Lebeau. The intense damage to his respiratory system prevented him for speaking for quite some time, but when he finally regained the capability, I came to an important realization. Some of the most awful things that I have done during my extensive career concerned unfortunate Remy, but he always recovered, fought the damage, and continued to live as normally as could be expected. Never again. There is no recovery from some mental injury and you managed to cause intense, horrifying psychological pain to that boy.

Now, to address your claim that Liz is wicked: I thought I would share a brief history to explain how the two ended up involved, as it seems to be a mystery to most. As my apprentice, she is a well-trained, effective physician; when I rescued Remy, I brought him to the lab and we slowly nursed him back to a reasonable state. At the time, I do think that my fatherly love blinded me from realizing the type of bond the two were forming. Or, possibly, their romantic attachment did not form until later. That is not really the point. What is the point is that my supposedly 'wicked,' cheap' daughter connected with Remy due to the malicious acts of your untrained, impulsive team. So, if by 'moral vacuum' you mean 'girl who saves the X-Men from one another,' then yes, Liz is a moral vacuum.

A moral vacuum that is superior to Lebeau, who will, in all likelihood, never fully trust anyone else out of fear of abandonment. Trust should be the foundation of a marriage, and knowing what I do about Remy, trusting Liz is simply impossible for him. I understand their attraction on many levels. She is a quiet intellectual, very well-behaved, and he is the rough masculine man that disturbs what she perceives to be a boring lifestyle. In truth, I do not know how long the relationship has lasted or when it began; my first realization that it existed on any level was the day I stumbled onto them copulating on Liz's kitchen table in the Oxford apartment.

Charles, I would have taken his head off right there, had I been allowed. Unfortunately, that was two years ago, and my theory about that being a weekend fling, along with the one-month fling, the casual affair, and yearlong affairs were proven very wrong. Why must she do this? My Lizzie! I nurtured her when she was just a child, constantly begging for my attention. She has rebelled against her upbringing and against me by pursuing this ill-fated romance. And Remy…this is retaliation against me, I am certain. Taking my daughter away is something a foe would do. Taking my daughter's virginity is something only Remy could execute.

We must stop this marriage. If Liz is hurt by Remy, I make no guarantees about Remy's safety. As her father, I have mulled over and even written down quite a few plans to wreak havoc upon Remy if he breaks her heart. Turning him into a powerless, quadriplegic woman actually ranks very highly on that list. If you care about either of them, you will assist me in ending their relationship.

**Nathaniel Essex **

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**Dear Nathaniel,**

Have you ever considered getting help?

You fluctuate between pity, admiration, and complete disdain for Remy. Although, I felt the same way last Tuesday when I spotted them mid-sexual intercourse high in a tree outside my window.

Why do I tell you this? Because I know that it will cause you more anguish than burning down all of your labs at the same time. And I am pleased with myself for causing it.

Curiously, you seem to have no problem fulfilling the roles of amoral scientist, loving father, and physician; most people would find any of those roles to be far too intense, especially the one that involves attempting to tame the black-haired animal you insist on referring to as a person.

Amusingly, you seem to be unaware or possibly in denial of Liz's true disposition. Under the 'I am here to help people' façade there lurks a creature of certain evil. The way her mind functions, the things she says…sometimes I think Remy and Hank are the only ones that do not secretly fear her. While she never formally joined the X-Men, she has proven to be a highly skilled doctor and a good friend to Hank. However, the infirmary is the only place where she does not cause unnecessary drama or pain. Like her unscrupulous father, she enjoys playing with the lives of others like a puppeteer.

How is it that Remy can tolerate her? I do now know, but I am sure your assessment of their basic attraction is incorrect. Quite simply put, Remy is the laid back, ruggedly handsome calm guy. And Lizzy is the sexed up fireball that shakes his whole life up. Liz is Remy's addiction, and vice versa. Liz craves normal things because of Remy, like marriage. Without that sliver of normalcy, there is no doubt in my mind that she would grow up to be a more humane version of you.

Out of curiosity, what are you going to tell your daughter the next time you feel an itch to cut into her future husband? Does she even know about the things you've done to Remy? As far as your rant on the Massacre is concerned, I have my own opinions as to why that occurred.

'_Is not acceptable cost what I am so often critiqued for?'_

Yes, it is. The fact that you are willing to accept death, pain, and torture appalls others. Unlike you, the X-Men do not leave a trail of death and ruined lives everywhere they go; there is no doubt in my mind that the world is a better place because they exist. The same absolutely cannot be said for you. Or your spawn. I pity Remy for so many reason. Make no mistake, Sinister; my need to call of this marriage is atonement of my own, fulfilling the need to protect one of my own from future harm, having been unable to save him before. Why it is that Remy feels he deserves to suffer through a relationship with Liz is beyond me.

We both understand why Remy was left behind. The Massacre was your fault, front-to-back, as well as the consequences, one of which was Remy's abandonment. Had it been an event the X-Men were not involved in, we both know he would have been scorned, but left on the team, probably without punishment. But the X-Men were there that day, and they suffered a significant amount of emotional harm as well; I do regret what happened to Remy, but I cannot in good conscience hold any of them responsible for their reactions. From a purely logistical standpoint, my team is better off without Lebeau entirely because he ruffles so many feathers, especially with those people who left him there. What I regret most of all about the entire situation is that they didn't simply execute Lebeau. They left him vulnerable to you, and God knows what you and your Lizzy did to him then!

Has he not suffered enough? Why must he subject himself to further torture at the hands of the Essex family? I believe that if Remy had a higher opinion of himself, he would pursue a more compatible, nicer woman.

To answer your question, yes, I will help you break them apart, but I will not use my powers to do it and I do not wish to be revealed as ever having conspired with you for something that most would perceive as being so ridiculously petty.

Charles Xavier

**Read and review. Or else!**

…

**Pwitty pwease?**


	3. Like Snowball, but Dumber

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

B Oots – Thanks for the comment! You'll see the grand plan in Chapter 4. Yay!

**Chapter 3 – Like Snowball, but Dumber**

**Three years ago**

Remy stumbled down the hall of Sinister's massive main lab, held up by Sinister's strong arm. "Good. You are improving." He hated it here, more than anything. Sinister lead him to a door, then opened it, leading Remy outside of the massive main lab. "Time outdoors would benefit you." He said, almost begrudgingly.

"Remy ain' dumb, ya fucken' creep." He said, leaning on a large rock that the entryway had been cut from. "Whatcha plannin'? More tests? Want me t'kill f'ya?" He stared at the ground. "Remy's done wit dat shit."

Sinister said nothing and opened the door, whistling and then waiting.

Remy, while puzzled, didn't particularly care what Sinister was doing. "If y'got dem intentions, drop Remy off at da South Pole where y'found him and fuck off."

"No, Remy. As much as I would love to revert to my old practices, things change." He leaned over and picked up a large white rabbit that walked through the door, summoned by the whistle. "You are like this rabbit, Remy."

Remy crossed his arms and rolled his eyes. "How?"

"If I hurt or kill you, my daughter will hate me." He said, running his fingers through the rabbit's fur. "I left her to watch the lab, and my genetically-altered rabbits had names when I returned, including this one, previously known as 'specimen 22a.' Now affectionately referred to as 'snowball,' who sleeps in my bed while Liz is at university and occasionally nibbles on my ears while I rest." His look was one of defeat and anguish, having his projects ruined by his need to make the young girl happy.

Remy laughed, loudly and uncontrollably, for several minutes, his arms remaining crossed. Finally, a mocking expression planted itself on his face. "Liz, the big-breasted nurse is your DAUGHTER? I've been hopin' she'd let Remy put his hands on dem! Least he knows she like him, non?" He returned to laughing until he realized what he'd just said and bit his lip.

Sinister stood up completely straight and glared into Remy's eyes with the most threatening look he could muster. "If you appreciate having hands, I suggest you keep them to yourself." Remy nodded nervously as Sinister handed him the rabbit and they turned to walk back inside.

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**Present Day**

Sinister opened the tesseract and stepped into Remy's bedroom, hoping to surprise him, scare the hell out of him when he woke up, and then threaten him.

"Oh god, Remy, harder! Fuck me harder!"

"Liz…Chere, J'ai besoin de toi!" Remy's bright eyes opened. "MERDE!"

Remy rolled off the bed in an attempt to dodge the blast that shot out of Sinister's hand and burned a hole in the headboard. Liz rolled off with him, dragging a semi-charged sheet with her. Remy withdrew the charge and looked around, clearly startled. "Dad! Get out! Now!" She stood up and wrapped the sheet around herself and pushed Sinister out, "Have you ever heard of knocking? Or, maybe just teleporting into the hall and giving us thirty seconds to lie to you!"

"Liz!" Sinister yelled, prompting Logan to open his door and peer down the hallway, chuckling at Sinister yelling at his sheet-clad daughter in the hallway that smacked of sex. Some situations require no explanation, and he'd seen this very one take place twice before. The door quickly closed. "LIZ!" Sinister said again, as if checking to make sure the girl was truly his daughter. "Lizzy…" He groaned, and leaned down, resting his head on her shoulder, only to find that it smelled like cigarettes and Aqua di Gio; this was the smell of Remy if there ever was one. "Why must you do this to me?" Sinister said, almost whining.

"I love him, why can't you understand that?" Liz replied.

"I nurtured you as a child. You sat in my lap while I read you stories…and now here we are." He said, as if devastated.

"With all due respect, Father, I'm a little too old for your lap. A girl grows up and she leaves her father's lap and has to find a new one." Liz's face twisted into a strange expression as she realized how asinine her statement sounded.

Sinister sighed. "Why HIS lap? Remy is not right." He said, referring to Remy's mental state. "We have had this conversation before, have we not?"

Liz nodded. "Get dressed, you and Remy come downstairs to Xavier's office. We all need to have a talk." Sinister said. "I give you five minutes, do not even think about resuming those activities!" His face had a soured look as he turned and walked down the hall, remembering a similar occasion when he caught them accidentally twice in less than half-an-hour, having kicked Remy out of her apartment while visiting, only to find that he returned minutes later.

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Sinister opened the door and sat down in one of the chairs, spotting Remy, who had somehow beat him to Xavier's office, sitting on a couch. "You disgusting cretin! You have pink lipstick on your chin."

Remy smirked. "Remy knows. Left it dere jus' f'you, Dad!" Essex suddenly felt his right eyelid begin to twitch. "T'anks f'givin' Remy's femme a name dat sounds nice wit his. Liz Lebeau, sounds nice, non?"

Essex was silent for a moment, clawing unhappily into the arms of the chair. "Sometimes, Remy, the only consolation I have is the memory of all the times I tortured you for no apparent reason. Remembering your screams make me smile on the inside. Son." Sinister gagged on the last word as if it were poison.

Undefeated, Remy laughed. "Liz is a screamer. Remembering all da times she yelled mon name and all dem ot'er dirty words she knows makes Remy smile. Guess he just trying t'say he identifies wit y'."

"Please stop talking, Remy, because you are really pushing me." Sinister said. "I will render you sterile if you say one more thing before Xavier gets here. Am I clear?"

"Non! Remy assumed y'did dat already…maybe y'fille and Remy need t'start usin' protection?" Sinister's head shot up and his hands began to shake, as if his entire body ached to kill Remy. "Kiddin'!" Remy chuckled. "Get it?"

After a few moments of threatening silence, Essex sighed again, this time as if he was in some sort of pain. "Yes, Remy, it was very simple, a bit like your entire existence." He turned his chair around to face Remy. "Out of curiosity, did Liz ever tell you Snowball has a higher IQ than you do?"

Remy nodded. "Oui. T'ink somehow we made an exchange in y'lab. He got mon smarts and I need to fuck Lizzy like a bunny. What's y'opinion, Doctor Dad?"

"My opinion?" Sinister laughed sarcastically. "There is no doubt in my mind that I should have left you to die." Remy smiled at him, enjoying Sinister's obvious anguish. "Someday, I hope you have a daughter that falls in love and runs away with a trucker. A fat trucker, who is too old for her, fat, covered in tattoos, and an alcoholic. With a mullet." He forced a smile at the frustration Remy would feel in such a circumstance.

"Remy knows yo'not wishin' dat on y'future grandchildren."

Essex couldn't take it anymore. This was too much.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, REMY!"

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**Read and review. Or else!**

…

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	4. The Plan

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

BJ – Yay! Nice to see you enjoy it. I'm enjoying writing it. There is homework to be done. Fuck that, I'm writing about "Sinny," a nickname I've never heard used for him before, but plan on stealing. :D

**Chapter 4 – The Plan**

Xavier entered his office, Liz following him. He took his place behind the massive desk and she sat down next to Remy on the long couch. "Now," he began trying his hardest to appear unbiased. "Dr. Essex and I had some concerns we wanted to address with both of you before the wedding next week." He folded his hands and looked at the couple, "Is everything in order?"

"Oui," Remy replied, holding her hand as she leaned on him.

"Stop touching her. Now." Sinister said angrily. "You have done enough touching for today."

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**_Step One: If you can't beat 'em, bait 'em -- Success_**

"Dr. Essex, please…Liz, would you mind sitting somewhere else?" The Professor asked, picking up on Remy's apparent contentment on being close to her. "I really want you two to think about this – marriage is the final step."

Liz sat in a chair next to Sinister, conveniently putting her closer to her father than Remy, and putting Sinister between them. The metaphoric value caused him to smile slightly, enjoying his walk on the wild side of evil. "Now, Elizabeth, you have three master's degrees and a doctorate in fields of literature and foreign language. What type of career are you going to pursue?"

Liz quirked at the question. "I am a doctor. I studied literature because even the best universities are years behind the medical skills I learned from my father."

"And has it occurred to you that Remy is an idiot?" Sinister said, bluntly.

"Look, Xavier, we can't have a reasonable conversation with him here. I love my dad, but he is a tad bit possessive." Liz said. "Like, he took me to a park to let me interact with other children when I was little, and got into a fight with a woman because her son tried to hold my hand. He called the boy 'genetic trash' and threatened to sterilize the woman."

Xavier nodded and smiled, "Well then, maybe your father and Remy can leave for awhile and we can take care of some business." His eyes met Essex's, who was clearly enjoying the good professor's manipulative tactics. "If you could excuse us for a few minutes?"

Sinister and Remy walked out silently. The walk was silent because they were both met with a flash from Lizzy's red eyes, which she only used to communicate intense anger or frustration. As a whole, any sign of her blue eyes flashing pupil-less red was very, very bad. On the last occasion Sinister and Remy had gotten into a fight, Liz opened two tesseracts and threw them into random places on opposite sides of the planet.

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**_Step Two: Divide and Conquer – Success_**

"Come with me, Remy, there are some things that we need to discuss if you honestly plan on marrying my daughter next week." Essex said, trying to fill his voice with enough concern to trick the Cajun. "First of all, what are your future plan with her?"

Remy shrugged. "Live here, be an X-Man. She'll be da good doctor, 'course."

"Are you going to have children?" He said, hating himself for having to talk with Remy in a pleasant manner. He hated himself even more when he thought the presumption through in more detail.

"Oui." Remy said, suddenly realizing that something was very wrong with this conversation. Essex congratulated himself and more or less kicked Remy's psychological legs out from under him with his next question.

"Do you honestly think you would make a good father?" He gritted his teeth before the next concession. "I know I was a bad father, even though I thought I would be perfect at it. Failing a child is…the most awful feeling there that exists." He put a hand on Remy's shoulder. "Could you handle it? Failing Liz, failing your children? Do you think there are men who are more capable of taking care of her? And of Liz's future children when the day comes?"

Remy looked down and crossed his arms. "Oui, Remy t'ink he do his best t'love her and be dere f'her."

"Sometimes your best is not going to be good enough. Do not kid yourself, Remy. It may be my fault, but you are not stable or emotionally strong enough for a girl like Liz. Besides, this whole relationship is the result of her pity for you." Sinister leaned back, and watched Remy's eyes widen. The Professor had told him Remy had once told him about his fear that their entire relationship was Liz's way of trying to make up for all the things Sinister had done to him. That was supposed to be a secret between Remy and the Professor; Remy didn't know that Essex knew.

Remy said nothing and looked up at Sinister with an injured look. "Y'sayin' she love Remy for da same reason she love dat fucken' rabbit? Cause y'fucked us bot' up so bad we'll never be normal?"

Regardless of the fact that Sinister knew not whether this was false, he wore his serious face. "I am truly sorry, Remy. I am sure you understand my concerns about having my daughter marry someone out of a sense of duty." Not wanting to say more and reveal his true motives, however accidentally, Sinister walked away from Remy, leaving him there to mull over the fact that he'd just learned his relationship was built on pity.

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**_Step Three: A Contest of Wit – Failure_**

Xavier stared across his office at Elizabeth Essex, his suspicions about her genuine lack of emotion seeming correct at the moment. He could never really be sure about any of his theories about her; her raw, semi-developed genius made reading her usually-deceptive actions incredibly difficult.

"Really?" She interrupted his half-finished lecture rudely and crossed her legs, making it clear that she was not actually going to listen to him.

"Out of curiosity, what must I do to make you listen to me?" Xavier asked Liz, who picked at her nails.

She smiled, but never looked up. "What is the objective of this meeting?" Xavier flinched at the almost sadistic tone she could take, the presence she commanded with so little effort, and most of all, the flickering in her eye sockets that revealed an on-the-edge Liz.

"To talk." Xavier said. "About your relationship."

Xavier knew, deep down in his heart, that whatever came out of her mouth was going to be bullshit. Still, wanting to see the good in Liz, he hoped as he waited for her response.

"I love Remy soooo much!" She replied, slightly saccharine in tone. "We wanna get married, and have babies, and stuff. Like OMG OMG, Remy said that if I like, marry him, we can like, have sex all the time and all. And he'll stop sleepin' with the other X-Women behind my back! He loves me so much!"

Bullshit indeed.

Xavier wringed his hands and then stopped. "Why must you do this to me? I wish to have a serious conversation and you…have to go ruin it."

She shrugged and picked up the Rubik's Cube on his desk, solving it in about fifteen seconds before putting it back down. "I love Remy. Remy loves me. Simple?"

Xavier nodded. "Sometimes love isn't enough." He said, suddenly realizing on the differences between Sinister and Liz was the fact that she was kind for the most part. The rabbits, Remy…she hated some of the things her father did, but stayed with him anyway. "Do you really want another man in your life who you have to love so much that his shortcomings cease to matter?"

Liz's eyes closed for a moment as she sarcastically shrugged. When she opened them again, Xavier jumped. "I realize that you think you're doing what is best for Remy, but Remy is almost thirty and this is his decision to make. Now, do you have any real point to make or are we just going to sit here and fuck around all day?"

"I believe we're done, actually. You are a lost cause, Elizabeth. Now, hide those demonic hell windows rolling around in your eye sockets and leave my office."

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Essex strolled into the Professor's office after a second talk and settled into the chair he'd been in earlier. "Xavier, what is wrong?" He said, noticing the Professor resting his head on his hands, looking exhausted.

"Liz saw straight through our plan." Xavier said. "She didn't seem very pleased."

"I suspected she wouldn't." Essex said, slightly amused that even the great Charles Xavier was crushed under the weighty intellect of Liz. The fact that she rarely, if ever, employed it in important decisions was beside the matter. "Have no fear, the seeds of doubt have been cultivated in Remy's mind. I have no doubt that the wedding will be canceled."

**So…it their plan a success? Is Sinister just being an arrogant bastard? Is Remy in love? Leave me comments, people! Remy's fate rests in your hands! Or not. Just leave me comments, because it makes me smile. Also, I apologize for the humor that didn't fit well in this chapter. Will resume in the next.**


	5. Grief

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

BlkDiamond – Yay for people that leave me comments! I appreciate it greatly, I really do. So, here's the next chapter…Hope you enjoy!

**Chapter 5 – Grief **

One Month later…

Xavier finished listening to Logan, who was nursing a massive burn which was closing on the left side of his face, and grimaced, opening his laptop and typing an email to his favorite enemy.

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_To: Nathaniel Essex_

_How is Liz?_

_Hopefully, she is coping well. Remy is impossible to live with! He is moodier than Jubilee with premenstrual syndrome and keeps blowing things up for no apparent reason. One assumes his arrogant, womanizing personality would allow him to cope well, but this has not proven to be the case. He's also lost about fifteen pounds and never smiles._

_Was breaking them up truly the right thing to do?_

_-Charles_

………………………………………………………………….

**Sinister's Lab**

Sinister walked into Liz's room and pried a box of chocolates out of her hand. He sighed and sat down, watching her while she slept. Popping one of the chocolates into his mouth, he quickly spit it out in the trashcan next to her desk. "Raspberry, vile fruit," Essex muttered as he walked toward his room in the living area of his main lab. "I should create a pestilence that kills all raspberries. That would keep them from hiding in decadent chocolate shells and tricking the unsuspecting!"

Sinister sat down in front of his computer and checked his email, typing a quick reply to Xavier:

…………………………………………………………………..

_To: Charles Xavier_

_He lost fifteen pounds? I found it. Tell Remy he can find his excess body fat on Liz's thighs, where all of her newly gained weight managed to distribute itself. I couldn't be more pleased because the more weight she gains, the less sexually attractive she will be._

_Liz, like Remy, has also proven a storm to be weathered. It breaks my heart to see her weep non-stop and binge eat, it really does. It has been over a month and I am beginning to fear that we made a blunder in breaking them up, especially in the manner we did it. The fight they had that night was somewhat remarkable, and I am unsure as to whether or not they could salvage a relationship from the wreckage, even if we attempted to put them back together. I just do not know how much longer I can stand my Lizzy being like this._

_-Nathaniel_

……………………………………………………………………..

He clicked 'send' and got up when he saw Liz standing in front of him. "Hello, Darling. Are you feeling better?" Tears ran down her puffy face as she shook her head. Mr. Sinister himself was defenseless against her bawling eyes as she looked up at him. "Honey, you are going to be alright. Just…tell me what we need to do to make you feel better."

Essex wrapped his arms around her as she cried into his chest. "I don't know, I just don't know. I love Remy so much! I didn't mean to say all those mean things to him or fight or ruin everything!" There was an element of guilt that Sinister had not fathomed; he had assumed that breaking up Liz and Remy would mean thing would return to the way things had been before. But they didn't. Liz was miserable and lonely, missing Remy constantly, and he felt guilty for playing a role in breaking them up, even if she didn't know it. She sniffled as Essex attempted to comfort her.

"Darling, you have to let him go. He left you, it was for the best. He knew he could not care for you." He said to his daughter, who simply sobbed.

"This is your fault!" She said between breaths. "You broke him, you ruined his life, and now he thinks he can't be there for me because of what you did to him!" Liz wiped her eyes and walked backwards, tottering between intense sadness and anger. Finally settling on anger, she turned and stomped away to her room, pulled out a bag, and started haphazardly throwing things in.

"Where are you going?" Sinister said, confusedly.

"Back to Oxford. Maybe I'll get a degree in American Literature, or Physics, or anything that requires me to be on a different continent than you!" She said. "You hurt my ex-fiancé, and because of you, he thinks he'll never…"

"Darling, please!" Sinister said.

"No!" She said, tears still falling from her eyes as she disappeared through a tesseract. "Goodbye, Father. I need to get away from you!"

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

**At the Mansion…**

_BOOM!_

"GODDAMIT REMY!" Scott yelled, hitting the ground when a charged card landed on the ground in front of he and Jean as they were leaving the mansion. Remy slid down the roof and peeked over the edge.

"Désolé, mon ami!" He yelled.

"Sorry? You're sitting on the roof throwing explosives in random directions! The mansion diameter looks like a mine field!" Scott barked.

"_Professor, I fear Remy is not coping well with his breakup. Have you spoken to him?"_ Jean said to the Professor telepathically.

"_Yes, Jean, I have. I did not anticipate this type of grief to accompany their breakup…he'll become more tolerable as time passes." _The Professor replied, before checking his email for a response from Sinister.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

_To: Nathaniel Essex_

_Nathaniel, were you suffering from empty nest syndrome? It makes a lot of sense, but you do need to respect the fact that Elizabeth will leave you for a man someday. And, I honestly think that Remy and Liz could be a good thing. Well, better than Remy brooding and blowing things up. All I know is that it's been a month and Remy is empathically forcing us all to feel the edge of his loneliness and angst. _

_After growing up as your daughter, I do believe that Liz COULD forgive Remy, but she'd have to want it. And after the fight they broke up on…I'm not entirely sure if we could make either of them see how miserable they are making everyone around them by being apart._

_-Charles_

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Back at the lab…**

Essex laid on his daughter's bed and conversed with Snowball.

"Well, Snowball, this is a fine mess." He reached out to pet the rabbit, only to have his left index finger nearly bitten off. "I probably deserve that. She will be back, she has to come back, right?" The rabbit hopped across the bed and landed on the pillow next to Essex's head. "Without her, I end up moping around and talking to a mutant rabbit like a pathetic fool." He got up and walked back to the computer.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

_To: Charles Xavier_

_Empty nest? Perhaps. I have considered that._

_However, none of that matters, because Lizzy became extremely angry with me earlier and left. She feels that it is my fault Remy is in the position to feel incapable of truly taking care of her. There is only one solution to avoid my being estranged and her being unhappy for the foreseeable future._

_**We must find a way to get them back together.**_

_-Nathaniel_

**Coming Up: Sinister and Xavier team up to get Remy and Liz back together, hoping that the damage they caused in breaking them up won't keep them apart. Xavier gets caught playing dirty with the young ex-lovers. **

**But, I need comments. So, if you're reading this, click that magical button and leave some feedback.**


	6. Rebound Foul

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

B Oots – I keep updating, and keep ignoring my homework. Slackers rock!

Bunsdarien – Very happy you enjoy the story so far, and hope you like this chapter.

**Chapter 6 – Rebound Foul **

Sinister opened a tesseract into an alleyway in Oxford near a café where he knew Liz could be found most mornings; and there she was, eyes still swollen from crying. Since he was about to try and put his baby back together with none other than the man he disliked most for the role of Liz's 'man,' Essex had to make sure that she was unhappy. Remy, in his mind, was a last resort, and not something a person should logically want. Of course, his daughter was not the most logical creature in the world. Sinister groaned as he thought about what he had to do and then disappeared before Liz sensed his presence.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Xavier's Office**

"You have no idea how much I loathe Remy." Sinister said. "God hates me, I am sure of it."

"With everything you've done, are you surprised? If I were a deity, I would probably hate you as well." Xavier replied, sipping his tea. "How are we going to proceed with getting Remy and Elizabeth back together?" He said, when another explosion was heard outside.

"Does he do that all day?" Sinister asked, almost surprised. "Because, I can turn his powers off like a light switch, if you would prefer."

An appreciative, but pleading smile appeared on Xavier's face. "You'd do that for an old enemy?"

"Yes, but only because I need your help. It is crucial that we conceal our involvement in all of this." Sinister said. "Both of them would be infuriated if they learned of our planned role in their initial breakup or our attempt to put them back together."

Xavier nodded. "We should approach this primarily by exploiting Remy's weakness for Liz. He'll see how unhappy she is, and feel obligated to help her."

Sinister smirked. "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, I must be Remy Lebeau." Sighing as he put his teacup down, he became silent for a moment. "And how are we going to prompt them to forgive one another?"

"We could get them drunk." Xavier interjected.

"That's preposterous!" Sinister said, then thought for a moment. "But I see your point. Drunk people are needy."

Xavier smiled. "Liz is needy in a very different way. The same way Remy is. They'll end up —"

"Shut up." Sinister said, harshly. "The thought disgusts me in every way imaginable. I do not understand why you find my paternal pain to be so amusing."

"Because it's yours, obviously." Xavier replied as the two finished concocting a new plan.

Sinister cursed and left. _'Why must I do this? Remy disgusts me, and is the only way to make my daughter happy. Damn you…whoever you are to make my life this miserable!"_

The next morning, Sinister climbed out onto the roof. "Hello, Remy."

"Why y'here? T'gloat?" Remy said.

"No." He sighed and sat next to Remy. "She's miserable. You need to go back to her."

"Non." Remy said. "Remy ain' interested."

"At least come with me and see how upset she is…she could really use your friendship." Essex said, needing to vomit, but suppressing the urge.

Remy chuckled. "She lef' ya, didn't she?"

"You find this amusing?" Sinister asked.

"Oui. Y'never gonna understand Lizzy, because y'her Pere, not her man. Y'stopped bein' her man when she got her first kiss." Sarcasm laced his voice as he took a long drag from the cigarette. "What does Remy gotta do t'make y'leave?"

"Give me ten minutes; we will go to Oxford, and then I will return you to this roof. If you see how sad she is, and still do not want to help her, then I will leave you alone." Sinister said, knowing Remy would be unable to deny her lovely blue eyes being as sad as they were.

"Merde. Let's go den, Casper." Remy said sharply as they walked through the tesseract and into the alleyway in Oxford.

"Now what?" Remy said impatiently.

"End of the alley, you can see right into the café." Sinister replied as they ducked behind the corner to hide from a couple that walked into the alleyway kissing. But this wasn't just any couple. It was Liz and Brian Braddock, the reputable Captain Britain, making out heavily.

"What da fuck!" Remy yelled, punching Sinister in the jaw.

"Remy?" Liz recognized his voice and angrily walked toward it's source, seeing Sinister and Remy in the alley, a look of shock on both. "What are you doing here? With him?" She said, pointing at her father. "And you! I told you I wanted to get AWAY from you. That means 'Don't follow me, Dad.' So what is this?"

Braddock took one look at Sinister and nearly leapt out of his skin. "YOU!" Liz grabbed Braddock by the arm when he tried to run. "That man is your father? Get away from me!" Liz let Braddock go, and he immediately left.

"Let me guess." Liz said angrily at her father. "You wanted to know how his powers worked. One more superhero with a crippling fear of dear old dad; one more relationship down the tube. And what is Remy doing here?"

Sinister and Remy just stared until Remy began to yell.

"What da fuck is dis, Sinny? Y'brought me back here t'show me how great Braddock is? Fuck you, Remy ain' interested in y'fucken' fille no more." He said.

Liz crossed her arms. "Not interested? We almost got married a month ago and now you're not interested? Good thing we broke up, eh?"

Remy got in her face. "Remy don' need y'pity love, Remy don' want it."

"Good, because I'm not offering, am I?" She yelled back as her father slowly beat his head on a brick wall. "I did notice that you managed to travel around the world and stalk me. Would you like to explain what that's about, asshole?"

"Non. Remy jus want y'and ya fucken' pere t'leave him alone." He said, sneering at her. "Guess dats too much t'ask. He'll be cuttin' me up and you'll be tryin' t'make me jealous with Capitan Perfecto!"

"Consider it done!" Liz yelled as she stomped out of the alley.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

**Professor's Office, Five hours later**

"It's not uncommon." The Professor said. "Sometimes, people try to replace their former lovers by initiating an inappropriately time relationship with someone else."

Sinister nodded. "She's on the rebound, then." He rubbed his temples and closed his eyes. "Suffice to say that plan backfired on us."

"Indeed." The Professor said. "Did you really turn Braddock into a test subject?"

"Yes, I did. Turns out his powers are unremarkable, and vamped up by his suit. I was unimpressed." Sinister said, briefly explaining why Braddock was terrified of him. "He is all wrong for Lizzy though. Too…dominant. She would end up killing him, I have no doubt."

"What now?" Xavier asked, feeling lost as to how they were going to undo today's damage, as well as the damage they'd caused breaking them up.

"McCoy is close to Liz, maybe he could help if you explain our predicament?" Sinister stated.

Xavier nodded. "I will speak to him later."

"Good Lord, we have created quite the fiasco." Essex said, leaving Xavier in his office. After finishing some paperwork, he went down to Hank's office, prepared for the lecture he knew Hank was going to give. Hank's huge chair was facing the window, tipped back, like always.

"Henry, I need to enlist your help in a…delicate matter." He hurriedly tried to explain what happened. "Essex and I orchestrated the breakup between Liz and Remy, and now, we're trying to get them back together and encountering a formidable amount of difficulty."

"Hank?" The Professor asked when no response came. _Slit!_ He heard a lighter, followed by the smell of cigarette as the chair turned around and revealed its true occupant. "Oh shit." He said, looking straight into Liz's eyes.

"Hello, Professor. Did you miss me?" She said, calmly as she crossed her legs on top of the desk. Xavier didn't answer, so she asked another question. "And what, may I ask, was your motive? My father is clingy and hates Remy, but what real benefit did you have? Keeping an Essex out of the X-Mansion? Protecting Remy from an 'evil' woman?"

"More or less." The Professor replied. "You are highly manipulative."

"Me?" She laughed and got up. "I'm not the one fucking around with everyone's lives. Tell my father to meet you in your office tomorrow morning at ten. I think we all need to have a heart-to-heart."


	7. Victory or Not

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

NodNarb – It is my honest belief that, in this position, these characters would be cursing, probably a lot more than in my portrayal of them.

**Chapter 7 – Victory…or Not**

Sinister entered Xavier's office and realized that something was wrong. Or right. Whatever it was, he was out of the loop. "What's going on?" He said, noticing Remy and Liz sitting on the couch, Liz nestled in Remy's arms.

"Remy and I decided to take things back into our own hands." Liz replied.

Sinister looked at Xavier, who shrugged. "Liz found out."

"Uh-oh." Sinister said.

"What's wrong, Daddy? You look like a child caught with his hand in a cookie jar." Liz said, an infuriated but detached look on her face.Sinister cringed as Remy's tongue laced the inside of Liz's ear, making her giggle. "I can't stay mad at you, not now."

Remy and Liz held up their hands to reveal wedding rings. "Marital bliss, non?" Remy said, smirking oh-so-triumphantly at Sinister, who felt the long lost urge to blow Remy's face off.

"NO! I was supposed to walk you down the aisle!" Sinister said, feeling very upset.

"That's right." Liz said. "In the wedding that should have taken place a month ago. You totally forfeited your right to do that when you entered into a conspiracy to make me unhappy." She leaned on Remy and kissed him just to spite her father, then grinned.

"Wait…you two are not mad at one another?" Xavier asked.

"Non. Mon épouse and I are mad at you two bastards." He kissed her again. "Dat right, Mrs. Lebeau?"

"Yes, yes it is." They stood up. "We're going on our honeymoon, and when we come back, things are going to be different. Don't even think about trying to pull this bullshit ever again. Am I clear?"

Xavier quickly nodded, Sinister sat down and looked around the room blankly as Remy and Liz walked out of the office, leaving the two men alone.

"At least we got them back together." Xavier said.

"I hate Remy. So very much." Sinister said. "If I killed him, do you really think Liz would hate me forever?"

"Probably." Xavier replied, trying to suppress laughter. "Didn't we set out to keep them from getting married?"

"Yes, we did." Essex said, defeated. "Then we tried to get them back together, then we screwed everything up worse, and now they have eloped. Suffice to say I genuinely regret having interfered in the first place."

"In other words, Liz is going to be angry at you for awhile?" Xavier said, laughing. "The great Nathaniel Essex, defeated by the moody glares of his daughter! What say you?"

"I blame this on you, fully and completely." Sinister sighed and opened a tesseract. "I need to brood. I sincerely hope you enjoy reveling in my suffering."

**The End.**

**I hope you enjoyed. Check out My Reasons II, where Sinister tries to adjust to having Remy as a son-in-law!**


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